Dating signs he wants relationship
Frances' first-date trick (known as her "Heartache Prevention Question") is simply to ask him, point blank, if he believes in X (X being your ultimate dream and goal, be it monogamy, marriage, having a family, or running away to join the circus).It may seem simple, but it's incredibly effective if you're prepared to really listen to his answer."On a first date, a guy's gonna basically say, ' I don't believe in love' or ' I'll never get married,'" says Frances.A guy who wants to really be in a relationship with you and is really ready for a partnership doesn't need to push like that.Guys who want to seriously date you want to see you in person."On dates 2 and 3..."On the second and third dates, what I like to have my clients do is really pay attention to how consistent he is.Here's the problem: Frances' first-date trick works perfectly, but most of us don't to the answer we get.Raise your hand if you ever fudged the facts in your mind because you really wanted to see things through rose-colored glasses with a promising guy [raises hand! Well, the fudging-of-facts bit carries on throughout a relationship, sometimes keeping us committed to the wrong guy for months (or years).
You know how you feel after a date, but, "If you proactively short-circuit a man's ability to chase you by chasing him, then you can't see his level of interest," Frances explains.If you're just looking for sex, then carry on, but if not, how can you tell if a guy is really right for the long-term?Lauren Frances is one of my favorite relationship experts, and she happens to focus on these particular struggles in her books and one-on-one coaching.In fact, she's known for helping women weed out the wrong men right on the first date.In order to do that, she devised a way to tell whether a guy wants the same things as you, which should be the foundation of any long-term relationship (we discussed it here on Smitten a few years ago).